January 2012
1 post
And she arises from the ashes.
I— wow.
… and the room is silenced.
i don't know if i feel any better or not, but...
December 2009
8 posts
yeah, okay.
anyway, sorry for being dramatic and all, but i don’t think there’s anyone who really honestly cares, so i’m going to go for it anyway.
i don't even know why i still get on tumblr,...
i love how my best friend always acts embarrassed of me or something.
it’s like… i flaunt her because she’s amazing and hilarious, but whenever she has friends that i constantly tell her i wish i could be friends with, she doesn’t even bother mentioning my existence.
i dunno, but that kind of pisses me off.
separation anxiety |six|
A slightly generic glow of homesickes washes out of the gleaming panels of glass. They brilliantly reflect the blinking city lights. From miles away, the skyline shines like a star, ostentatious and inviting. aWalking the bustling streets of Chicago helps me forget the sinking pit in my stomach, the violet pounding and hammering in my head. Chicago helps me forget my home, because I feel at...
separation anxiety |five|
There is a generic flow to the way people think. In a way, most people expect the worst out of the world, or they expect the best. It goes both ways, yet we still end up questioning and second guessing ourselves with one foot in our grave. Even those who have no regrets and live life without glancing back, those who are determined and those are just so sure… imagine a completely different...
separation anxiety |four|
How do you feel? Now that you pace the bustling corridors and you let those insects you consider your pathetic peers see your true weakness. Gentle cloud grey orbs lined with a canvas of bloodshot suffering star blankly, vermilion and hideous. Perhaps you are embarrassed or ashamed, perhaps your eyes only flood with more tears. Those demonic salty drops blur your already damaged vision,...
separation anxiety |three|
Time is a concept I write about often. It’s a reoccuring theme, just as is handwriting, lying, apologizing, and making no sense at all. They are my trademarks, if you will. They are the words and ideas you can expect from me every so often. I guess you can say I’m just a predictable person.
short and sweet. i hate being predictable.
separation anxiety |two|
Will I end up the outsider, still? Part of a world I love, but not my first love? Wishing I had dreamt bigger dreams? Been more sure of what I wanted? Less worried that I wasn’t going to be good enough?
No. I was worried I wasn’t good enough for anything.
Am I trying to please someone? Do I want too much? Did I speak up too late? Am I…
Not good enough?
Did I expect too mcuh?...
November 2009
3 posts
holy. freaking. shit.
seriously? another freaking sob story for myself? what’s wrong with me? really, why the hell am i this way?
i’m so sick of myself right now. why do i have to be so whiney? is that why the only people who even bother to ask me how i am or why i’m upset are the people i don’t know? why? what the hell? this is stupid.
i’m going to bed to see if i feel better in the...
what is my life anymore?
i really hate things right now. i kind of want to punch a wall, because even when i’m happy, i’m not happy.
i’m freaking stressed out and it really freaking pisses me off.
let’s just say STRESS + PMSing = NEAR SUICIDAL.
not quite, but near.
hmm...
how are you today?
October 2009
7 posts
it's been a long few days.
i am honestly so freaking tired of so many freaking people.
something tells me the rest of this year is going to be a bumpy ride, and i may be the only one really trying to prepare for it.
well, shit.
danny
can see through you.
“I’m a musician, God forbid I have time to write music.”
– P.M. Stumph
Chuck Palenuek was wrong.
we can’t cry by ourselves.
which is why i cry right now. because no one is around but you. and you… is… well, no one.
jeez louise.
busy busy busy. i’ve been writing off the hook and yet, i still manage to get nothing done.
my head has been swimming in music land for the past few weeks, thanks to marching band (heck. yes.) and patrick vaughn/martin stump/stumph whateverhisnameistoday. so far, all i’ve managed is to listen to every fall out boy song i have on my mp3 player and bash my head into the wall repeatedly...
September 2009
2 posts
MLIA (my new favorite pastime) →
Lights Out
been thinking lately, and all i’ve really come up with is the earlier you start to type, the quicker and more efficiently you type later in the day.
i know, very useful, yes?
August 2009
3 posts
“FML sounds like a good way to sound whiny and obnoxious. The most ridiculous...”
– someone.
“I’m not going to change who I am just to be nice. I’m an asshole,...”
– Paul from Work.
July 2009
2 posts
Two A-M
What I don’t unterstand Is everything about me.
What I don’t understand Is why I am, the way I am Who I am, because I am Where I am, when I am.
What I don’t understand is every punctuation mark That says “I am here. What now?” is the way my mind will wander In oppostie directions And still manage to make sense… Do I make any sense?
What I don’t...
Separation Anxioty /one\
Normally, I’m not the type to be outrageously and extraordinarily creative. I say the tern ‘normally’ lightly though, as I have a tendancy to do things… out of the norm. That’s not to say I’m crazy or anything, but rather that I’m an individual who is content with the average but enthralled by the ordinary being transformed into something special in simple...
June 2009
13 posts
Symbiosis (Middle)
Another gasp filled my chest with unnecessary air. This time it woke me. Jolting out of bed, the plain blue sheets clung to my sweaty form. A frantic hand raked through my unruly hair. My breaths were shallow and ragged, heaving. I took one flighty glance at the empty, boring room around me before grabbing the bedside phone in a tight grip. Speed dial number four. Ring. Ring. Ring. Ri- click...
So That Solves It.
Daniella: We're so VIP I forgot to laugh.
Jameson: Where are you getting these?!
Daniella: My head. It's very irritating.
“You’re the rotten apple of my blind eye.”
– a cynic.
The First Classics
What whispers in my ear, The warm breeze through french doors, Blowing the curtains towards the high ceiling. Graceful like none other, Tickling my cheeks and Turning the corners of my lips Into a carefree and peaceful smile. Tall grass swaying in time to What whispers in my ear. What whispers in my ear, The metaphor for a perfect spring day. My hear slow to beat As if I’m...
Symbiosis (Beginning)
Shaking, my fingers touched blackness. It felt inky, the blackness. Like a river of thin, colorless water. Well, I guess it wouldn’t be colorless, as black is every color of the spectrum absorbed into one. But what I was surrounded by was, in a way, not even black. Random colors flitted across my vision, dancers twirling from left stage to right. Red, yellow, teal, indigo… multiple...
Cooties
Did you know? I love you. Have you heard? I love you. Has it been said that the aching of my bones Is the only way I could ever feel about you? … Every heart claimed to be true, minds maybe so, Yet no one will care as much as I do. I’ll sing along, I’ll steal a line, Pay attention, listen close, hold on tight; So many sudden stops and blocks in the road, But somehow...
“Sanity is a commodity these days.”
– Zach.
why am i so damn cynicle?
i need to stop.
must be a menace.
stop me, please.
“Boomerang my head back to the city I grew up in, again and again and again,...”
– Fall Out Boy
Miss Lake Effect Kid
The new administration likes to say They’re still the same band, But I’d beg to differ And although I love them all the same Things just haven’t been the same Since Vaughn traded in Martin For a new sense of accomplishment.
Back in Chicago, Where the streets greet me With a welcome home Sense of accomplishment, I’ll go searching for The old administration And hope to say...
Martin Was Golden
You always seem to jump at me with a soft smile, and eyes the size of [baby worlds].
-you’ve become the moon I gaze up to when I’m loenly, when I’m inspired, when I’m asleep, when I’m awake-
Just the way you make melting hearts the only wish to wish upon stars, and holding hands the only [simple pleasure].
-you’ve become the endless pit I fall into with a...
On The Back of My English Quiz
Forcing the lines. With too little, too much to say. Life takes a turn And the words spill helplessly on the page.
There is no warning. There is no before and after. No cause and effect, Just… words…
11/12/08
April 2009
3 posts
Letter to the Editor
Force fed coruptions and opinions of a revolution, And I don’t really care.
Maybe some day you’ll understand that I paid money To hear music To see a show To feel free. Maybe some day you’ll understand that I didn’t pay money To hear a speech To see a costume To feel trapped. Let’s think less politics and more music.
Because, as it is, I already know I’m...
I Don't Want To Grow Up
[[a series of outstanding and honest poems stolen from Jameson in hopes that Nate Navorro would kill me with his rap skills and maybe, just maybe, someone besides me will pay attention.]]
throwing things the alcohol the words oh, the words were never my fault so what’s this facetious “thank you” for?
//
you’re not the only ones with lives things are crazier than ever...
“Quiet IS the new loud.”
– Patrick Stump[h]
March 2009
5 posts
DANNY
is having some [not-so] temporary insanity issues. please ignore her.
Between the Hearts and the Autopsy Tables
He was leaning against the wooden door frame, eyes clouded and voice lazily ringing through the hallway. His neck rolled back so his head was touching the wall and his singing grew a little louder. I could tell he was just bored, not under any influence, but as he continued humming the tune I’d never heard before, the lasting impression left me feeling slightly queasy.
- - - -
Anxiety...
Twitter FTW →
Thanks For Everything
Classify me, judge me, stereotype me,
Place me back into the group where I belong,
Into my safe zone with half hearted smiles
Wasted time, wasted air, waste of space.
You’re very welcome,
Have a nice day.
February 2009
4 posts
Suffocated My Last Chance
Nostalgia? No, thanks. I’ve got a band competition today.
Well, anyway, just listening to Keane (the old stuff) and thinking up ways to spend my time while I wait for call time.
Not much to do but write… and write… and write… and well, you get the point.
Oohh, it just changed to Fall Out Boy. I can go for that.
Which reminds me, I’ve officially made a vow to...